Closing in on two months in France, I’ve started to become more accustomed to the French way of life or “art de vivre”. Whether consciously or not, I find myself picking up on customs, methods of greeting, and social norms I was completely unaware of before leaving the US. France has numerous examples of deep culture. The French lifestyle is much less work oriented and places a high value on social connection and amusement. Students go out to bars and stay there late when they have class the next day. The end of the workday doesn’t necessarily mean going home; it often means grabbing an “apéritif,” often consisting of charcuterie, cheese, and perhaps wine. Weekends are a time for travelling home or doing activities with friends. This doesn’t mean the French neglect their studies or work; they simply fit studying around life, not the other way around.
The French are also much more personal with their close friends and more formal/closed off with strangers. The French often greet each other with “la bise,” or a kiss on each cheek, and are not afraid to poke playful fun at each other. In fact, most of my Italian and Spanish friends also do “la bise.” The first few times experiencing it I clumsily struggled to know which side to start on. On the other hand, the French can often be closed off to people they do not know. It’s much less common to strike up conversation with random people here than I have experienced in the US. For example, cashiers and shopkeepers don’t extensively converse with customers, and greetings and farewells are very standardized and formal. Normally, you greet strangers with “bonjour” and say farewell with “bonne journée” (have a good day). Around 5 or 6 in the afternoon, the greeting changes to “bonsoir” (good evening) and the farewell to “bonne soirée” (have a good evening). This is the standard formula and is more formal than they “hey” or “hi” we often use in the US. In addition, greeting a stranger by asking them “how are you” or “how’s it going” is seen as incredibly strange. The French think this is a genuine question and generally treat it as an invasion of privacy.
Looking at more obvious surface culture, the French really do eat bread as often as Americans think they do. Walking home from class, I often see French people with a baguette under their arm, presumably getting ready to eat it with some cheese or perhaps save it for breakfast the next morning. The cuisine tends to skew more elaborate than stateside as well. While American food may include more simple dishes like Philadelphia cheesesteaks, NY style pizza, cornbread, and texmex, French food often consists of beef or chicken recipes refined over centuries paired with finely aged wines and cheeses and desserts like crème brûlée or madelaine cakes. Music played in bars and clubs also tends to be more international, with a healthy mix of American, Spanish, French, and African-inspired songs.
I personally love the food and language the most. I have always found speaking French to be more fun than speaking English but never had much of an opportunity to do so in the US. In addition, I am loving the assortment of food, especially the cheese, and have even found some local soft drinks, like Orangina (sparkling orange juice) and Oasis (a sweet fruit drink), that I will certainly miss when I leave. As I meet more locals, I can feel myself picking up on more traits and incorporating many of them into my daily routine. What I once used to find to be massive culture shocks I often no longer think twice about, and they may even prove to be hard to shed once I return to the US.
