As Americans, we often don’t realize how explicit and direct our communication style is until we step outside of the country. This distinct contrast has become very real to me in the last few months since coming to France, and it has been one of the most unexpected, yet formative experiences of my internship. I was prepared to encounter differences within the culture, however I underestimated how frequently I would encounter these differences and how deeply rooted they would be to the French way of life.
The United States is generally perceived as a low-context culture, meaning that our way of communicating is quite direct and explicit in instruction. We state our expectations and primarily rely on verbal communication to get our point across. On the other end of this spectrum is high-context style, which is how France tends to operate. This layered way of communication requires much more interpretation and context of the situation. It requires more energy and observational skills, as communication is dependent on tone and situational awareness rather than solely speaking. You must think about what is being implied, because what is being said is only part of the conversation.
In my day to day life, this subtle shift has led to some instances of miscommunication. I still struggle to escape the habit of small talk, as there are times I find myself asking how people are doing because it feels natural to me, despite the lack of casual conversation fillers in France.
In addition, I continue to notice the kinds of discussions being held and the different kind of listening that is required to engage in conversation like this. I have gotten better at carefully phrasing my words and actively thinking through my responses before speaking. Conversation is an art, and it is necessary to internalize what is being said and how it is being said in order to truthfully understand what is being conveyed beneath the surface. Especially working in a field as sensitive as this, the high-context aspect of communication here is not only about clarity, but also a form of empathy. What you say and how you respond greatly impacts the direction of conversation as well as the emotional response from those you are speaking to, so choosing your words carefully and changing your rhythm of communication from a low to high context is very important. This has been an adjustment for me personally, as I am still learning to comfortably sit with the silence. Given my unfamiliarity with this contextual environment, silence can feel uncomfortable and even disengaging when you aren’t used to it. I find myself wanting to fill the silence and relieve the awkward gap between the flows of conversation, however this silence serves an important purpose. It allows us to formulate thought and reflect on our discussions. Not every pause needs to be immediately resolved, and I have had to remind myself of that.
At the same time, I have also had to adjust my own communication style when engaging in conversation. Being direct is not necessarily wrong, but I have had to consciously think about how I am framing my words, as my directness has not always landed me in the right position. I can come in a bit strong at times, and I’ve had to be more intentional about my pacing and reframe my approach based on the context.
In the workplace, and especially with email communication, these differences are more pronounced. Messages are much more layered and require more precision, so it can be hard to read between the lines. What I thought was initially formal in a professional setting still required some adjustment to match the level of politeness expected in the French context. Emails carry multiple layers, and how you phrase what you write is very purposeful and must be chosen carefully. I have had to become much more attentive to all forms of communication here, and this has taught me to be more reflective and willing to carefully dissect conversations instead of rushing through to understand what’s being said. This is not only a useful skill when working someplace abroad, but absolutely necessary, and it is something that I will take with me everywhere I go.
